February 21st - I called our tax adviser to make sure I had everything for our taxes. As he was reviewing the information, I told him we needed to remove Caleb from the taxes this year. He asked if it was a temporary thing & I had to remind him that Caleb died in 2011. Another "first" I wasn't prepared for.
February 23rd - Caden has finally gone 30 nights in a row dry! In celebration of the big event, we had breakfast at I-Hop (his favorite), a carousel ride at the mall, a trip to the Lego store for more Legos, and new bedding (Star Wars themed, of course). As his big reward, he now gets to sleep on the top bunk of the loft bed we got him several months ago. He was so worn out by the time we headed home that he fell asleep in the van.
February 27th - Richard stayed home from work with what we thought was the flu. He went to the doctor late that afternoon & came home with a different diagnosis -- pneumonia. He said they almost admitted him to the hospital because of it. I barely slept that night because I kept listening to him breathe.
February 28th - I woke to a text message from my mom letting me know my pawpaw had passed away shortly after midnight. He'd had heart surgery the day before, survived the surgery then died of a massive heart attack several hours later. It struck me pretty hard. Not so much that he was gone, but because I don't know if he had a relationship with Christ. I don't know if he's with Caleb and other family members in the presence of God Almighty and that thought greatly distresses me. I wish I knew for sure.
I've also read about people dreaming about someone they have lost. In the almost two years since Caleb died, I've not had one dream about him. I've dreamt about other family members, friends & even people I knew many years ago for a short period of time, but never the one person who's face I would most like to see.
But that's okay. I am assured that I will see him again one day. We will spend eternity together in the presence of God. And until that day arrives, Jesus holds me tightly in His arms and never leaves my side. Through tragedy and triumph, He is always here. He rejoices when I rejoice, and holds me when I weep.
Christ is my:
All in All (Colossians 3:11)
Breath of Life (Genesis 2:7)
Comforter (John 14:26)
Deliverer (Romans 11:26)
Everlasting Father (Isaiah 9:6)
Fortress (Jeremiah 16:19)
God (Genesis 1:1)
Healer (Exodus 15:26)
Intercessor (Romans 8:26, 27, 34; Hebrews 7:25)
Judge (Isaiah 33:22; Acts 10:42)
King of Kings (1 Timothy 6:15)
Life (John 14:6)
Messiah (John 4:25)
Omega (Revelation 22:13)
Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6)
Rock (1 Corinthians 10:4)
Savior (Luke 2:11)
Truth (John 14:6)
Vine (John 15:5)
Witness (Isaiah 55:4)
Yahweh (Genesis 2:4)
and so much more than I can ever describe!!!
In His presence is the place I long to be. Knowing that Caleb is already there comforts me more than anything else.
We still miss Caleb every moment of every day. He is always in our hearts, always in our thoughts, and is loved today, tomorrow, in ALL ways to infinity and beyond.
Angel, Richard & Caden